In the beginning what?

Yeah! It is 7:30 and the piles have started again. grrr. I could sleep in today because I don't start work till one, but noooo. stupid economic expansion. Ya Get what ya wish for, I guess. It is very cool to see so much construction in a city that has seemed dead for so long. Now, if only the people who lived in the city could feel this way. technically I live in the city so people in the city do feel this way, I guess. There are still so many people being so negative, like what is going on and is clearly visible all over is not really happening. How can the human race be so blind. Don't need the Bible to see that. We are just ignorant and fear change; neither of which are good excuses.

So What else to talk about. I feel better this morning but still have to deal with a lot of stuff, but I feel the decision is right and I am at peace with it all. hmmm something else. I think today I will experience the joys of the library. I have never had one this close and It will save money over buying books. I feel torn because I see books as a status symbol, and I guess they are. Your collection tells people who you are and what you enjoy. If I am going to reach my savings gaols, then I can't afford books.(or anything else for that matter). I think it is a pride thing. I have to read a used book, how dare I. Wow I feel dirty witting that but on a small level it is the truth.

On saving money, I am amazed how much money I can have left over each month by cutting back on a few things. Being single, I used to spend about $75 on groceries each month. I have cut that back to about $45 by cutting out all prepared foods. You know, the stuff that you just microwave and then eat. It is not really healthy anyway. I also have limited my meat choices. I usually bay a few pounds of dark chicken meat (boneless because I spoil myself) and then get the rest oy my proteins from beans and such. Works out well, but I can squeeze that Dollar amount down more, and will try next month.

I like life to be simple, filled with little clutter, but here is where the lazy (and the hypocrite) kicks in. My home tends to be a little crazy with stuff strewn about. I am working on it but always excuse myself because I am male. Don't knock it, that excuse works. and this is a short paragraph.

Music! Madina Lake just came on. Got to hear them live, they are very good but they had a really short set and was a bit bummed over that. That whole concert was great, but I felt torn by it all. Rock really is filthy, in the language and the message, but I love the music still. HIM was good but not as good as I would have hoped. The most depressing band had to be placebo. They just sucked beyond anything. Not a huge fan of them anyway, but I still expected more from them. Taking back sunday was by far the best act. They played the crowed and were lively on stage. The music and vocals were tight.

I can not stand bad vocals, BIG pet peeve. Personally, 90% of the people that sing the National Anthem should be publicly flogged for butchering it so badly. Sing through the phrase, don't take breaths were you would not if you were talking. Is that so hard? oh and please stop it with that gargling opera voice thing. Just sign the song, don't add any "special" (i.e retarded) personal touches. It is a good song and does not need your "help". *sigh*

So many thoughts course though my mind and I can never get down what I planned or even remember the "gems" that floated across the void seconds ago. That is a big thing I will need to work on. my memory tend s to leak worse then a sunken ship (i know a terrible analogy). oh That is what it was. I was thinking on food. I love food. I love to cook. I am not saying I am good at it. I think good is not how anyone would describe my food. Eatable is usually a great description.

It is a beautiful fall day. The sun is shining and there is that perfect cool, crisp air outside. The smell of fall is not quite here, but it is close. The only bad part of fall is it is a reminder that our 7 months of potential snow fall is almost here. Snow season is from Columbus Day to Mother's day. Our First frost is just a couple weeks away. I love this place though and for all the troubles here, it will be difficult for me to leave should I have to.

OK. I had some notes from my reading that I will put up here. I will probably do this a lot. it seams a good place. At least till I get a notebook or 10.

So I read this devotional about temptation. The idea was that we create our own temptation so by virtue, it is only as bad as we make it. Temptation is also not a bad thing. To be tempted is not a sin. To fail the test is bad but the temptation is neutral. It should always be a lesson for us though. IF you pass you have learned something about yourself and how to deal with issues. If you fail, well, now you have the joy of learning how to deal with that sin and all the consequences tied therein.

I also was reading the first 4 chapters of Genesis. The ultimate temptation. to be like God. and yet simple in form, nothing more then greed. I should get flamed for this, and Yes I am a pig (see Chinese Zodiac) I think the biggest punishment God place on women was the desire for a husband. I think to many people just kind of read over that. It was part of the punishment, a desire for her husband a punishment? Doesn't really seam like much.

I think men and woman are equal but different. If you believe that we are exactly the same, you are delusional. I think we used to be even more the same before the fall, but that punishment changed a lot. It is hardwired into women to find a husband, and to end up submissive to him. Woman fight this to death and I think that it is possible to suppress the urge but at the cost of other issues. To say it does not exist is also foolish. Why do so many woman stick with a guy despite there being so many flaws or even constant abuse. If this punishment was not in place we would see more woman in places of power. Instead most woman have little interest in direct power, but seek men or hold that power. ok enough with that.

From the very beginning of Genesis, (kind of redundant), and hence the Bible, there are hints toward some greater purpose for humanity then what is spoken. Looking beyond when we were perfect, there was a greater design for us. I Don't believe us being perfect was the original design. It was simply a means to an end. Our existence is to prove God's Perfection and provide companionship. I do not believe that either statement is fulfilled when we were perfect. I believe we are a controlled experiment (meaning nothing of this was unplanned or ever will be outside of God's true will.) to prove Gods glory and perfection to the world unseen or comprehendable to us.

We get to see God's personalties. He is one unit but with many aspects, i.e the Father, the Son, and the Spirit. We see God as the Father for the first time, not as the creator but on a more personal level. The Father set the rules, and we disobeyed them. The Father has the choice. Let it slide (and mock who he is) or punish use (and contradict the love, as some people see it). So here we now have the Father's anger and wrath, but it is out of love, not spite. We lose eternal life and will have to struggle till the end to survive.

But in the punishment we see the love. He had to punish us because he loves us and with out punishment there is no growth. To not punish is a mockery of the rules, and also does not show his love. This is all theory without the next act. Even as God is pushing Adam and Eve out of the garden he extends his compassion and grace to them. He provided them with cloths. It is a simple gesture, but he did not have to do that, he could have let us figure it all out on our own. So even in punishment the Father shows himself as loving and compassionate. Note to self: learn Hebrew.

That is all i have for the moment. Think I will do some more reading